


Rumours

by Butterflyfish



Series: Getting to know Daryl Dixon. [4]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Adopted Children, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Hurt, M/M, Other, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sexual Abuse, Smut, Temporary Amnesia, War, suggested harm to children
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-05-15 09:19:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 16,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5780281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Butterflyfish/pseuds/Butterflyfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daryl has been gone a long time, and everyone has all but forgotten him. </p><p>Everyone but Abra</p><p>A rumour has been stirring outside the walls, and it seems someone wants what Alexandria has.</p><p>***More tags etc will be added as the story develops***</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Day 190

I looked up. I don't know why. With Charlie asleep next to me there was no reason to break off from what I was doing. Bearing all my concentration down on these weeds, which were trying so hard to overtake the tomatoes, so I wouldn't slip and think about something else.

Or some _one_ else.

The night before I had dreamed of him, again. He was reaching towards me and said my name, but there was no sound, it was like he said it in my head, in _my_ voice.

Then there was his face, clouded in shadow. I knew it was him, but I couldn't see him.  
I was losing him.

When I woke up the dream didn't dissipate, but his face never swam to the forefront of my mind.

I looked up from my work there in the vegetable patch, and saw a man at the gate. I don't know where the watch was. We'd tightened down since the wolves broke in, but there was no one there, just this figure on the other side of the gate.

I grabbed Charlie and rushed forward, he weighed nothing in my arms, and he didn't wake or stir. I decided I was dreaming again. Charlie was a wriggler, a light sleeper in the daytime. Plus, no one was around and Alexandria was always buzzing with activity. But it was just me, Charlie, and the man at the gate.  
My man at the gate.  
  
I forced myself to slow down, this felt real enough but if it was a dream I wanted it to last. They usually ended when I saw Daryl's face, or not.  
When I got to three hundred yards and could still see his features I almost ran again, but he gave a single solitary shake of his head. Barely perceptible to those who didn't know him.  
It confused me, but I continued to walk slowly forward.

When I could see him clearly my heart raced to greet his, my body ached to hold him in my arms again. Once more he gave that single almost nonexistent head shake, then he looked to his right with only his eyes, where the iron fence was solid. I moved to my left, away from the open metal work of the gate, out of view.

I noticed his hands were behind his back, I noticed his crossbow strap was missing, and I realised something was incredibly wrong.

As I tiptoed to the side of the fence I heard the unmistakable sound of a gun being cocked, and I had to force myself not to yell. Not to push right through the fence and attack whoever was keeping my Daryl away from me.

"I told ya" Daryl said and I held my breath. He sounded the same as I could never remember. "ain't no one here who knows me, ain't never been here before" there was another voice, a deep and rumbling voice that had me hurrying quietly to the house.

"Rick!" I cried, after shutting the door "It's Daryl" I held tightly to Charlie as I almost knocked Rick over in my rush "he's at the gate but something's not right. I think he's being held against his will" I was breathless, excited. Rick's face changed and he looked like the insane man who killed Pete, the mentalist who demanded we not 'mix' with the Alexandrians

"Take Charlie and Judith upstairs" he said menacingly. "We'll get some weapons, get some people together"

"Wait," I shook my head, "he wanted me not to be seen. I think if we leave it, just for now, they'll go. Then we can track them. Rick I think he might get killed if you go roaring off after them" he cocked his head to the side

"Tell me exactly what happened out there"

"I saw him, I rushed but he gave me little signs to stop, when I slowed down I noticed his hands were tied behind his back and he doesn't have his 'bow. Then I heard another mans voice, saying 'if no one knows you, they won't mind if You die' and then laughter. That's when I came here. I think he'll be safe for a bit longer" Rick nodded, head still on one side but his eyes narrowed, and I could tell he already had murder on his mind.

* * *

**Daryl's Story.**

_Day 4_

I turned back towards home, but I din't get that far. I din't get home for a long time. 

Still lost in my own head I walked the same path in as I had taken out. There weren't many like me left in the world, but the less tracks leadin' to the Safe Zone the better. 

I hunted half-heartedly, not really hungry, not really needing to eat wild now we had a fuckin' larder.

It was late afternoon when I could finally see the top of the watch tower, the sun sittin' just slightly to the right of it. I walked faster, maybe I got sloppy in my rush to get back, maybe I said somethin' out loud to myself. I don't know how they found me, but they did, and they made themselves known by smackin' the side of my head with somethin' heavy, and knockin' me to the floor. 

I remember thinkin' I never shoulda left. I know my last thought was of Abra and that baby. As I lay on the floor, fightin' the dizziness, my hands were ripped to my back and tied together somehow, somethin' was put over my head and my ankles were bound. They dragged me to a vehicle and beat me unconscious.

The worst part was not knowin' where I was when I woke up, not rememberin' any part of the journey 'cause I was  knocked out.

The room I woke up in was dark, no windows, no light, real or artificial. The walls were painted dark too, so I had no idea if it was night, or day, or anythin'. I was layin' on my side, on the floor facing a door that look like metal.

There was a thump at the door as my eyes adjusted, and I realised my hands and ankles were bound with cable-ties. I also realised my head was pounding, and I had no idea how I'd got here.

A hatch slid open in the door and it felt like I was in some kind of solitary confinement. Eyes glistened at me, but I stayed silent.

"Hey there, Sleepin' beauty" a man's voice taunted. His eyes disappeared and I heard him say "Douche's awake, what ya wanna do?" There was a mumble of words, a new voice, but I couldn't make it out.  "What's ya name" the guy at the hatch asked. I knew my name, my name was Daryl Dixon and I was really pissed off.

"Fuck you" I answered, and the guy laughed heartily.

"Don't be too hasty sweetheart, we only just met!" He turned away again "He ain't talkin'" more mumbles, then "Tell us ya name and we promise to spare the kid when we rape and pillage ya home town, how's that?" Alyson flashed in my head, the only kid I knew of, my 10 year old daughter.

"Daryl" I said hastily, "Name's Daryl"

It turned out I was lucky that I could still remember my name, 'cause for a while I couldn't remember nothin' else. 


	2. Chapter 2

Day 7

I'd been locked up for days. My head still pounded, but the assholes who had me din't wanna give up medical attention for nothin', they wanted information. Problem was I din't have none to give. 

"You ain't eaten for three days. C'mon sweetheart, ya wanna starve?" I licked my lips, sore from dehydration. 

"Could do with some water" I relented, and my voice rasped. The face at the little hatch looked solemn, what I could see of it.

When Merle realised I was missin' he was gonna come n find me n destroy these assholes, I just knew it, bidin' my time was easy knowin' my big bro'd be on the way. 

"Bet ya need the bathroom too, don't smell like ya messed yaself" there was chucklin' from the other side of the door.  "Need to tell us what we wanna know though, boy. Can't give ya nothin' for nothin'. Ain't nothin' free in this world"   
I stood up, sittin' on the floor as I had been. I was gettin' better at movin' around without the use of my hands and feet, but I was goin' stir crazy in that fuckin' box. 

"What d'ya need to know?" I asked quietly. "What will it take just to get these damn cable-ties off?" The face at the hatch disappeared. "Hey" I called weakly, hobblin' over to it "hey!" I shouldered the door with all my strength and felt it rock with a loud crash in its frame. 

"Woah!" The face appeared again in the hatch, now millimetres from mine "chill out redneck, I weren't gone far." I eyeballed him through the hatch. He was big, huge, but he weren't in charge here, it was that other guy, The voice I'd only heard mumblin'. 

"What You call me?" I asked him, my cage well and truly rattled. "You say that again!" I threw myself at the door again, and it rattled loudly. The guy at the hatch backed off a little and then approached with a glass in his hand.

"Aight, look I got ya water, im'ma give ya this for free, but don't tell the boss, he'd fuckin' hang me." He reached through the hatch with one hand, the water in it was so tempting, and I angled myself so he could pour it in my mouth.  
It was humiliating, but I drank greedily. I considered bitin' his fingers off, but I'd still be stuck in this room, in these bindings. I had to think of some way to get out, I was going mad.

After they said they were considering hurting the kid, I guessed they were friends of her mother's. Or maybe that douche bag she worked for at the strip club. The questions they were askin' though, they din't make any sense. Askin' about 'my people' don't have any fuckin' people,  
I din't have nothin but my damn brother and a bed at my dad's old shack of a house.   
The only thing that meant anythin' to me was my little girl, and the only thing they said that made any sense was that they wanted to hurt her.

The hatch shut with a bang in my face, and almost had me tumbling backward. I righted myself and scratched my chin on my shoulder. I was stunned by the fact I was wearin' a leather vest.  Now I was gonna have Merle to damn well deal with, what the hell possessed me to put his vest on?!  
I threw my head back, stretching out my neck.   
I needed outta here.   
I looked around for somethin', anythin' I could use to break the ties I was wearin'.  
The walls were rough, and there was a section, like half a chimney breast where the corner stuck into the room. It wasn't much, but it might work.   
I edged up to it, put my back against the wall n scrubbed the cable tie against the exposed corner.   
It was hard work, and I wasn't well rested, nor had I eaten, and I started to sweat, my hair fallin in my eyes. That din't make sense. I'd had it cut a coupla weeks ago.   
But I couldn't dwell on all the freaky things happenin' around me, I had to get out, then I could find out what the fuck was goin' on here.   
Once I was free, I leant down to my feet, I looked at my boots, and suddenly thought to put my hand in one.   
To my surprise there was a small knife in it, nestled snuggly against my foot. So much so I hadn't noticed it before, it was like I was used to wearing a knife in my shoe.

They came back, askin' their stupid questions again. 

"Is this about money?" I asked, "cuz I ain't got none, but I can probly get some" the guy looked at me through the hatch like I'd gone mad. I made an effort to keep my hands together behind my back. 

"Money? Nah, ain't got no use for money anymore man, you know that. Maybe in the beginning, when people were lootin', but not now." Everything was about money, sooner or later. I din't know what lootin' he was on about though. 

"Is he talking?" The head honcho was out there. 

"This is about Alexandria, ya little community" I hobbled up to the hatch

"Who?" The guy at the hatch pulled a face, then turned and whispered to their leader, who then appeared at the window instead. He was smaller than I expected, but he looked mean, all dark eyes and hair, face set in a grimace. He eyed me a moment before whistling out a long breath. 

"How fuckin' hard ya hit him, Tones?" He looked away, then back at me "he's got fuckin' blood all over and nothin' he says makes any sense." I laughed 

"I ain't makin sense? Have ya heard yaself? I don't know who Alexandra is,"

"Alexandria. It's a place" the guy laughed, in shock "it's where you came from. Here, in Virginia" this crap was getting frustrating, I couldn't take this fuckin' nonsense anymore. I reached through the hatch for him. With surprise on my side, they thought I was still bound, I managed to get hold of him without too much effort. There was a commotion, but the lead guy held a hand up to his minions. 

"Fellas, leave it." He looked me in the eye "What ya think's gonna happen here, Daryl? You're locked in a room, in a building surrounded by my people. You're one guy on ya own." 

"My brother's comin'" the guy narrowed his eyes.

"He live at Alexandria with you?" I kicked the door, it rattled against its frame again and I thought, maybe, I could kick the bastard down.

"I live in Georgia!" I yelled "fuckin' Georgia, I ain't never been nowhere else!"


	3. Chapter 3

"You know the world went tits up, right?" I narrowed my eyes at the guy who was in charge.

"World ain't never been much fun for people like me" he shook his head 

"Nah, you know, dead people gettin' up again." I laughed, 

"N ya reckon I lost my mind?" I shook my head, still smilin' "dead's dead, man." It struck me that maybe these people were tryin' to make me crazy, I don't know why, maybe they were workin for Joanna-May, maybe if they sent me mad I wouldn't be able to see my li'l girl.   
"Is this about my kid?" The guy shook his head again.

"Daryl, we need to sit and have a frank discussion my man. You ain't gonna believe it. You ain't gonna like it, but it needs to be done. If I let you out are you gonna behave? Keep in mind I got seven sonsa bitches with me and you're just you." I thought about it for a moment. Stared him down and he stayed plain faced. 

"What's ya name" I asked him. Reminding myself I still had a small knife, if I needed it.

"Ed" he answered. So I nodded 

"Aight"  
They told me about the 'cold ones' the undead dead who got up and attacked people. They told me how it started and where we were now, they told me about Alexandria, and why they thought I come from there. They told me they wanted it for themselves.   
Some of it rang a small quiet bell, dead people gettin' up again. I could picture one in my mind.

They told me everyone I knew before was probably dead, including my li'l girl, but they thought I had a baby, if I was from Alexandria. That didn't ring true. I put my baby girl to bed the night before they took me, I could remember it clear as day. 

"Walkers" I said, when they were done "We called 'em walkers" It made me feel better to remember somethin', at least, but it confused me more'n anythin'. Ed shrugged and got up from the table we were sittin at, 

"It's a good a name as any I've heard before" 

Turned out we were in a police building, with a couple of cells and a few offices. Ed turned to me   
"You need to get cleaned up, then we need to see Sammy 'bout ya head"

* * *

 

Day 190

"He was just there!" I cried when Rick looked an accusation at me "Clear as day. Telling me to be quiet and stay outta sight, told the guy he was with he didn't know the place or the people in it" We stood at the gate, just us two, Rick demanding that Carl take Charlie from me so we could come out without the risk of noise. 

"Where was he, exactly?" Rick asked me, and I stood at the gate in front of where Daryl had been a minute before. 

"Here, but on that side, look" I crouched down "they're his foot prints" I motioned to open the gate, but Rick stopped me with a hand on my arm.

"They could still be out there. Where the Hell was the watch? Who was on this afternoon?" I looked up at the new tower we'd built, and along to the platform. There was still no one here. I shook my head. "You didn't hear gunshots? No commotion at all?" I shrugged, and Rick looked disheartened. "You gotta let it go, Abra. Get out of your head and back in to the real world" I looked him square in the eye and nodded 

"I know that now, won't be happening again." He tilted his head from one side to the other

"Well, maybe now it's too late" His pale blue eyes softened, and he took my shoulder gently. "Come on, you find out who was on watch and if they saw anything, and I'll get everyone together and we'll tell em what you saw." He dropped his hand away and looked at the floor before looking up at me again   
"Don't get your hopes up, he might've changed sides" I narrowed me eyes and shook my head 

"No. I won't believe that" he tilted his head again

"Yeah, well, just be prepared. I know what you've been going through, you know I know. It's time to let go"   
But how could I? I'd seen him right before my eyes. If anything now was time to grip on for dear life to the idea that Daryl could come back. 

Rick had no idea what I was going through, from what I heard his relationship with Lori was rocky at best. He had no clue what me and Daryl had, none. We were practically telepathic. I wasn't going to give up, not now I'd seen him in the flesh.

* * *

 

My memories kept comin' back in fits and starts. I remembered killin' Merle, but after that I remembered him goin' missin' n findin' just his hand. I remembered some asshole sheriff holdin' a gun to my head over and over. I remembered the prison, but couldn't make much of that at first.   
It was a jumble, a mess.

In the in-between the guys I was with found out I could hunt, I could track, and decided they could use me in their team.   
Not havin' anythin' or anyone else I decided to join them, it was that or dyin'. I din't feel ready to die. 

I kept my memories from them, anythin' that felt important I stored away and tried to work out later, in my bed on my own.

These guys wanted to take somethin' that weren't theirs, kill people in the process if needed. Shit, they even talked about rape like a fuckin' pastime. They were bad people, n deep down I knew I weren't one of em, I just needed the right memory to come back and prove it, and then the right moment to get out.

It was late at night, on my own in the cell they'd had me in from the beginnin', that I saw big green eyes in my mind. Huge eyes with long dark lashes.

I was tryin'a remember a conversation I'd had about trackin' which had come back to me earlier in the day, they were askin' if I could teach 'em, n deJa vu hit me with a dizzyin' Rush. N now these eyes came.

They stirred somethin' deep inside me, some fire in my belly was lit. I din't know whose they were, I din't know if they were from now, or before, but I knew those green eyes n the look they were givin', head tilted down, lookin' up under the lashes, was meant only for me. N I knew, the minute I saw 'em, that I'd have to find 'em again.


	4. Chapter 4

Day 190

  
I opened the gate  
I know what Rick said, but I could feel that Daryl was long gone again. I had to find the guys who were on watch today, find where they were and what caused them to leave their post. Their wasn't much that made us leave the tower and platform anymore, not since the attack. 

I had a feeling it was Abraham and Sacha, which made a knot in the pit of my stomach. Sacha was the least likely to run off on a whim.   
I shut the gate and put a hand on my hip, where the pink hunting knife with the wing handle still sat snug against my body in the pink belt.

"Abraham? Sacha?" I stage whispered, edging around the tracks left near the gate, and the wheel marks where a vehicle had sped away. So they drove in. I stored all the visual info and continued on my journey.   
I looked up, into the trees at the day, a hot September afternoon and the sun was blazing. 

As I looked back in the direction I was heading I saw them, Abe and Sacha heading my way.

"What the hell?" I asked as they approached "guys where were you? Rick is not happy you left the wall" Sacha looked at me, they were out of breath

"There were a bunch of car alarms going off down the street, we had to stop the noise" I felt my brow furrow

"There aren't any cars down the street" Abraham nodded 

"There weren't. Somethin's goin' on" I nodded right back at him

"You don't know the half of it. Daryl was here." They looked at each other then back at me. There was pity on Sacha's face "no," I said firmly "really. You better come in, I have a plan, and I need everyone's help."

* * *

Day 30

There were more than just the 8 people I was staying with in this group. I learnt that pretty early on. There were teams of people scattered all over, and on occasion one of our guys, dude called Tommy, would meet with members of the other small groups and come back with news. 

Today, he came back with news which worried me.

"Rumour has it someone's moving in on Alexandria" Tommy said. Ed looked him square in the eye over his dinner. 

"Who?" He asked, simply. 

"Group call 'emselves wolves. Bunch a dirty bastards who don't wash so far as anyone can tell. They found some pictures of the place, and are going to 'save' them all." I watched the exchange as nonchalantly as I could, but something twisted in my gut when I heard the word 'Wolves'.

"Save em?" Ed asked

"Yeah, basically they go around killin' survivors, freeing them from themselves" Ed nodded. 

"Ok. Let em. We'll see how Alexandria copes. Might help us with our attack. Good work Tommy" I looked over at Ed as he started to eat again and Tommy sauntered off

"What if the wolves win?" Ed shrugged at me, not looking up from his food.

"Buncha freaks think they're saving people's souls? I don't think they'll be a problem" he picked up his plate, and forked the last of his meal in his face. I sat back in my seat.

If I was connected to Alexandria, and I was starting to think I might be, then this attack was the last thing I wanted. If the owner of those green eyes was there... I stood up, having finished my own meal, and went to my room. 

I lay in bed and tried so hard to remember. They'd want watches at Alexandria now, to see what went down, and they'd never let me go.   
I needed to see it, I needed a jolt to my memory. I'd remembered so much in a short month, but too much still eluded me.

* * *

 

Day 190

I stood among my brothers and sisters and told them what I thought of the situation. 

"He was being held against his will" I exclaimed, looking at the eyes on me, the people who didn't believe a word I'd said. "I can track them, Daryl taught me how" I was getting desperate for someone to just agree, to acknowledge that yes, I had seen him with my own eyes. 

"In the police force," Rick piped up in the silence "you'd be classed as 'too close to the case' If we decide to go after him, you're the last person to go" I put my hands in my hair, gripped it in my fists, and growled

"Rick come on! I'm the best person. Daryl and I have this connection, don't pretend you don't know. I know him as well as he knows himself. " he did that head tilt of his showing he was about to shoot me down 

"I won't deny your relationship was... Deep. If he wanted to be found he woulda tried a bit harder" I sat down with a thump on a kitchen chair. 

"You think he didn't want to come home" I asked, not meeting his eyes "you think he left and that's that?" I shook my head, anger bubbling inside me. "This is Daryl! Forget me, forget everything else. Daryl isn't going to just go and not come back, is he?" I'd started to doubt myself, then Maggie piped up, thankfully on my side.

"She's right. It's Daryl." She folded her arms "he'd come after anyone of us." I eyed her subtly. It was Maggie who had convinced Glenn to go out in those first few weeks. But Glenn wasn't a tracker. I should have gone, but I had the baby. 

"Yeah, I'm with Maggie. It's Daryl." I looked at Michonne. So thankful that people were listening. 

"Ok, Abra, you got a plan, lets hear it" I looked at Rick, and then around the room. I began to articulate what I'd only just put together in my mind less than an hour ago.

* * *

Day 50

  
The men and women who called themselves wolves attacked Alexandria. I was right, they wouldn't let me go. I was struck how, in a way, I was still kept here against my will, to a point. I'd have to get out, as soon as I could. 

But Alexandria held its own, n 3 days later were already rebuilding the walls. Several people died, the guys spreading these rumours didn't know who, but I felt the girl with the green eyes and my family were OK. I'd seen, in the night on my own, the things we'd been through as the memories crept back. I couldn't imagine a bunch of guys without guns n without much purpose could tear that family apart. 

But I din't know for sure. I din't even have their names and faces, just that there were good people around me for a long time.

New rumours circulated, I was interested to know where these guys got their information. This one said that Alexandria had An armoury full of weapons. Ed didn't believe it, the people there seemed too naive and under exposed. 

"But the new guys are more experienced" Tommy retorted to Ed's disbelief. "They look like they'd been out there since the beginning." He looked at me, eyebrows raised. "Kinda like Daryl, scruffy, tired, knowin', ya know?" I looked at both of them.

"Thanks, you don't look too hot yourself" Tommy shrugged, and Ed got up and walked over to me, standing over me where I sat in the canteen.

"Your memories back yet Daryl?" His voice was full of threat, "Sammy said they should be, and I ain't hearin' a lot outta you. Ain't no one can survive alone out there as long you think you did." I stood. Stared him down with my greater height on my side and said, very softly.

"Nah, still don't remember much" his eyes narrowed and his stance turned threatening. I felt I had to give him something. "I remember runnin', a lot. I remember bein at a place where the group were cannibals and gettin' out alive. I can't remember anyone's name or face. If you wanted to know shit maybe you shouldn't a fuckin' beat me so hard" Ed looked at Tommy with a small smile on his face.

"I like this little firecracker. Take him with you next time you see the boys, See if anything jogs his memory on the way" he turned back to me "escape from cannibals, huh? That'd explain a lot." He took a step back, and I realised I'd invaded his space. "Thing is, when we found you, you turned, on the spot, and headed toward Alexandria. Just like that. That sound like something a hunter or a tracker would do? You weren't huntin', you sure as hell weren't trackin' you were out there just walkin'. Somethin' don't add up Dare and I need you to remember soon or you're gonna become pretty useless to us" he straightened up, puffed out his chest, and looked around him. He seemed to think for a bit, then looked at me. "Come take a walk with me Daryl, I wanna show you somethin'"

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN there is mild use of racist language in this chapter.

I din't like what he showed me. 

In a cell, the other side of the buildin' from mine. He opened the hatch and gestured I look in. As I did, the woman inside scooted back against the far wall so fast I'da been surprised if she didn't have road rash on her ass. 

"This is one a the wolves. Guys picked 'er up just outside, she was runnin' away. Won't tell us 'er name so we call 'er Princess" he looked in the hatch next to me "don't we, Princess?" She made an effort to cover her whole body with her arms and scowled at us. 

"She ain't Talkin'" Ed said, "we've tried everything we can think of, n if she don't give up information soon we'll be sending Steve in." I knew Steve, the guy at the hatch when I was the one locked up. I couldn't believe how much was goin' on here I din't know. I looked a question at Ed, then wished instantly that I hadn't 

"Steve likes 'em cold" he smirked "when we found him he was having a danger fuck with a guy who hadn't yet turned" he laughed heartily and I tried so hard not to let my disgust show on my face. 

"So, you'll kill her?" The girl in the cell began to sob, so I lowered my voice "Just, use her until she's used up?" Ed smiled a wide grin at me 

"S'what we do here, Daryl. Can't have her runnin off home again, she might give up information." He looked me up and down, then slammed the hatch in the door with a bang. "This brings me back to you. I like you Daryl, you've been quite useful, and your skills are spot on. But if you don't start rememberin' soon, i'ma have to send in Steve." He shook his head slowly "I don't wanna send in Steve." I shrugged my shoulders

"I'm tryin'. Maybe when I go out with Tommy... I ain't been out in the woods for a while. Feels like where I should be, ya know?" Ed patted my arm n I fought not to shrug him off

"I hope so, Dare, I really do"

* * *

 

Day 190

They went for it, in the most part, my plan to get Daryl back. There were a few suggestions and changes to my initial thoughts but everyone was on board, which went a hell of a long way with me.   
I was packing my things, weapons, supplies, and getting ready to check the car over when a polite cough had me turning from my work. 

"Aaron!" It was always a delight to see Aaron. He missed Daryl almost as much as I did. They'd been through a lot of shit together, I'd heard. 

"Going somewhere?" I nodded, not knowing what else to do or say. We couldn't let the Alexandrians know, Rick had said. They panicked far too easily, and despite the work we'd done to toughen them up, they still spooked at the smallest thing. I guess the wolves didn't help, but we'd been fairly safe since then.   
"Is it Daryl?" He asked, as though he could read my thoughts. I smiled sadly and nodded

"Just a hunch. We'll see" was all I said, then continued packing things. Rope, ammunition. I tipped open my gun chamber and checked it was full before strapping it into its holster. 

"Must be a strong one. You're so prepared" I smiled at him again. 

"I think we're on to something, Aaron." I turned back to my work "but you need to keep this to yourself. Ok?" I didn't hear an answer, I looked up and he nodded at me, then rushed forward and threw his arms around me. Taken aback I barely put an arm around him when he was pulling away. 

"Bring him back safe, Abra. Whatever happens" I nodded again, tears threatening. I waved my hands in front of my face 

"Oh Aaron, look what you did!" He smiled at me and nodded, leaving the house as quietly as he had come in. I looked at the door for a long time.

* * *

 

I worked hard figuring out just how much to give ed. which memories would sate his need without giving too much away. I kept the green eyes to myself, but shared other minor details which sounded a lot, but really meant nothing in the bigger picture.

Day 90

I went out a few times with Tommy, met with various guys from the other small groups. One day We stood amongst trees, in the middle of the woods, n I did feel like I'd been there before, I felt like, just around the corner, somethin important to me and my life stood. I'd mentioned it to Tommy, n at first he shrugged it off, but when the stories of the week had been shared he patted my shoulder and said

"K, lead the way man" I shrugged him off, and walked forward, my crossbow up the whole time, rememberin' snippets of things, as we passed a fallen tree, as the leaves crunched underfoot despite summer comin' n strong. 

"It rained" I said "A huge storm passed through." I looked back at Tommy, strangely proud of myself and the new memory. Maybe all I needed was somethin' familiar. He seemed disinterested. "We were, we were... " I looked up and there it was, the barn we had been in, after the rains came and we took shelter. "There!" I said, and Tommy was by my side "we had to hold the doors shut." I rushed forward and touched the wood walls as though they might speak to me.

It was the strongest memory I had, and green eyes was there, backed up against the door of the shack, her feet slipping on the floor. I felt myself smile, somethin about havin her backed against a wall, but it was gone. 

"You grinnin' at redneck?" My head shot around, and somethin' in me burned 

"Don't call me that" Tommy's eyes were wide, frightened, and I realised I had swung my crossbow up again and aimed it square at his head. His hands went up and he laughed nervously 

"Sorry, man, sorry. It's just, well, ya kinda are, ya know?" I shook my head, 'bow still at my face. 

"Nah. That's like, racism, like callin' a black guy nigger, like callin' Spanish people spic. Ain't no need for it, Ain't no one called me that and not regretted it." I dropped the bow as a sweet voice rang in my head 

_"Redneck prick" she had said. We were drinkin'. We shouldn'ta been.  
_

"You ok man?" Tommy said, but a dizziness struck me. Green eyes. All of a sudden I knew she meant the whole damn world to me.

 

I spent the whole of that night not only tryin' to piece together the rest of her face, but to remember her name.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN we find out just how evil and disgusting people can be in this chapter. I don't want to post spoilers, but rape is mentioned, so be aware and read on with caution.

Day 190

"It might not be easy" Glenn said, as he climbed in the car. I nodded

"Yeah, I know." We couldn't all go. It was me, Glenn, Michonne. If we all up and left, there'd be talk in Alexandria among the natives. Our group had already screwed up when half of them were out and the wolves attacked. They'd lost a lot of their own and we'd lost no one. It didn't look good on us.

"I know" I said again "but, I dunno, I have a good feeling about this" Michonne and Glenn shared a knowing look and I rolled my eyes "I know, I know!" I said in a rush "nutty Abra's on one again." I crouched down to the driver's window and looked at them both "don't you think I would have done this a long time ago if I'd lost my marbles over this? I didn't, I had Charlie to think about. I still do. Closest thing to a kid I'll ever have and the closest thing to Daryl I've had for over 6 months. I know exactly what you all think, I know what happened to Rick, but have you seen me talking to him when he's not there? Have I talked about him like I'm stuck in the past? No."

"You talk, loudly, in your sleep" Michonne said. I shrugged

"Well that's entirely different. Come on." I stood and headed to open the gate.

The plan was I'd go on a foot a bit, cover the tracks and the direction they led, then hop in the car with them. As the car came through the gate, I walked on my way, leaving Glenn to shut it behind them.

I followed the foot prints from the gate and to the road, until they disappeared and tyre tracks took over.

I wondered if Daryl had got his feet muddy on purpose. To catch a tracker, think like a tracker. And if a tracker wanted to be found, he left tracks.

I chewed the inside of my cheek as I followed the tyres for a bit, they didn't turn off. They did fade a bit. I took a map out of my back pocket and spread it out in front of me on the floor.

If they followed the road straight, they were staying in one place, If they turned off there was another town several miles east. I folded the map and started walking back, to be seen by Michonne and Glenn, who had begun to crawl behind me. I hopped in the passenger seat and pointed.

"Straight down here. I'll tell you if I think they turn off."

* * *

 

Day 105.

I woke up with a start, Ed was standin' at my door.

"What?" I asked, sittin' up n swingin' my legs out. I'd never been the type to hang around in bed. Not on my own anyway.

"Who is Abra" he said at length, leanin' against the door frame. I shook my head.

"I've no idea" He nodded, lips poutin', n he was about to tell me I was lyin'

"Yeah, ok. You were sayin' her name about two minutes ago, in ya sleep." He stepped into my room, sauntered, really. I could see he had somethin' to say.

"Dreams're funny things" I said. "I don't remember dreamin'" I shrugged "not sure I know anyone named Abra." I did. I knew now. It was her. Green eyes n coltish legs all the way up to her armpits. "Stupid damned name anyway" I whispered almost to myself.

"Yeah, I don't believe you" Ed was next to the bed now, n I saw he had something in his hand, it glistened in the little light comin' through the open door.

"What's going on Ed?" I asked carefully, backin' away.

"You need to start talkin', Daryl. Or I'm gonna stick this needle in ya arm, send ya to sleep from the waist up." I narrowed my eyes at him n moved away. I looked around me for my 'bow  
"I got the crossbow, outside the door. Don't worry, we'll stick ya with a regional anaesthetic, Davey will have his way with you and though you'll be awake, you won't be able to stop it." He smiled a terrifying smile.

"She's... She was... A girlfriend." He rolled the needle in his hand

"Like Joanna-May? You mentioned her in the beginnin'" I shook my head.

"Naw, Joanna-May was never a girlfriend. She was a one night stand gone wrong, resulted in my li'l girl." Ed nodded

"And where is Abra now? She at Alexandria?" I shook my head again.

"I told you, I don't know 'bout Alexandria. We had a prison, for a while. We used to go out helpin' other survivors. Found her in a makeshift lean to. Brought her back, that was that. Haven't seen her, I don't think, since the prison was blown up" Ed nodded

"I still don't believe you." He cleared his throat. Still rollin' that needle back and forth. "I think Abra is at Alexandria, and for some stupid reason, you left her behind. Her and the kid. 'Charlie' I believe his name is." I edged around the room slowly, headin' for the door, thinkin' he hadn't noticed while he grinned over his cunnin' plan.

"Guess the kid must be getting on a bit now, nearly four months? He won't know who you are, no daddy, poor boy" he looked thoughtful, then turned fast to face me

"DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT" he yelled, loud and echoing, n the door went dark as the bodies of Davey and Steve filled it. Dread bubbled up in my chest.  
"First, we're gonna have our way with you, then we're gonna find Abra and that baby, and we'll have our way with them. Maybe Dr. Sammy will have a drug to paralyse you but keep you awake, how does that sound? You can sit and watch and find out the question that's burning in all our minds." He stopped, and I daren't imagine what the question was. I wouldn't have to guess though. Dave chuckled behind me.

"Just how snug a baby can be" he guffawed n Steve joined him.

I din't have a huge recollection of Charlie, but regardless if I knew him or not these men were despicable creatures.

I was stuck, no 'bow, no help, just me n the big lads that filled the door, n Ed with his needle. I chewed my lip.

"What d'ya wanna know? C'mon man, just give me a chance to redeem myself." But Ed was shakin' his head.

"You've had enough chances, Daryl. I think it's time we did this our way." The wide boys at the door closed in, and Ed held up the needle like the kind of doctor you'd see in your nightmares.

I fought as much as I could, punched, n kicked, n ducked their meat-slab arms n pulled the knife outta my boot. It might as well a been a letter opener for all the use it was.

But I fought. 

I need ya to know, I fought until the last.


	7. Chapter 7

We drove maybe ten miles on one road, not necessarily straight, but ten miles on one road. I looked up from map just in time to see a turning with interesting markings.

"Woah, Glenn stop." He slammed on the brakes and looked at me. Michonne, in the back was shaking her head as though to clear it. "Sorry, I'll be two seconds" I dived from the car and ran back to the turning. There, on the grass, a feature which had caught my attention.  
I studied the grass carefully, ensuring I was right before I sent us all on a wild goose chase, then ran back to the car. "Back up," I said, barely out of breath but excited "there's tread patterns on the grass, they cut the corner" Glenn backed up fast and we took the side street. Now I knew more where we were heading, and I had a good idea where they'd be.

* * *

 

Day 190.

I went to a dark, cold place. The place in my head I found when my daddy started to beat me. It was cool nothingness that let me escape what was goin' on, what was happenin' to my body. I floated outside of it. I din't feel nothin'.  
It was little comfort, but it'd have to do.

Early in the mornin' the door to my room opened. I fought the urge to scoot away like the wolf girl had. I struggled with my muscles which tried to tense up on me. They couldn't know I was breakin', they couldn't know they were gettin' to me.  
Ed walked in, looked me up and down with a sneer.

"Aight Daryl. We're off on a journey." I din't answer, I din't move. I was bound again, hands behind my back. "Stand up" he said, comin' in to the room. He reached for the waist of my jeans and I stiffened "calm down princess, just gonna do your belt up, here" I looked away to the side while he fiddled, holding my breath, fightin' the urge to head butt him. I'd learned, by now, that fightin' din't make it better. It just wore me out.  
I'd decided I was stuck here until I died.

Though everythin' had almost come back, everythin' I had reached for, I wished it hadn't, now I knew I was never gonna see anyone again. I would be used until I was used up. Weren't no way I was gonna give 'em what they wanted from me, no more than they'd already taken, anyway.

"C'mon you," Ed said jovially, takin' my arm like a fuckin' woman. "Gonna see if we can jog ya memory, one last time"

  
We drove to Alexandria. I knew what it was, I knew where we were. I stood at the gate hopin' no one was around. But then, in the distance, a part of town I couldn't remember, maybe it was new, she knelt. Tending to weeds or somethin'.  
She was beautiful, even from the distance. I din't want her to see me. Not how I looked, how I felt, violated n broken. But I willed her too, anyway, n she did. She grabbed the bundle of yellow cloth to her side n stood n ran to the gate. For the first time ever she seemed ungainly. She looked confused, lost, like she din't believe it was me. My heart broke as I realised she was holding my grandkid. My Li'l girl's li'l boy, and the last pieces of the puzzle fell into place.

  
I tried to make her aware that this wasn't a reunion, and she read all my tiny signs. I just had to think somethin' and she did it, like I remembered.

  
I remembered!

  
She couldn't read the hurt, the intrusion, the broken soul inside me, on my face. I was glad. She could never love a broken man. She needed strength. I didn't have any left.

  
I heard her soft footsteps as she rushed away, n I hoped they'd do somethin', get together and help a guy out.

"Won't mind if ya die then, will they" Ed said, laughin' like a lunatic. He hadn't seen Abra. "You really ain't gonna help us out, are ya redneck?" The word meant nothin' anymore. I din't have the energy to care if they called me a redneck, a hick, I just.. Din't care. "Aight. Those guys from the tower'll be back, we better get going." He grabbed me again, pullin' me forward as I looked again through the gate. Abra had gone inside. That was somethin' no one was around.  
 I stumbled into the mud, and as he righted me, callin' me some pansy ass name like sweetpea or somethin', I made sure my boots got plenty muddy. I made sure I left some kind of sign that I'd really been there.

* * *

 

We reached a town some twenty miles later. Michonne and Glenn convinced we'd gone the wrong way.

"I feel it" I said, just before buildings started appearing either side of the road again.

"How do we know where?" Glenn asked. "How the hell do we know where to start?" I looked out at the buildings.

"Car could still be warm"

"Oh no, no too risky. They might have people watching" Michonne piped up "this is what Rick meant, Abra. You gotta think clearly" she sat back. "They knew enough to draw Sacha and Abraham from their post. They're smart." I narrowed my eyes.

"Not smarter than us. Have a little faith, Michonne." I threw my head back and tried to think. The light was fading. "Darkness. It'll work on our side if it's dark out. We'll park down a side street."  
"We still don't know where he is" Glenn said, sounding annoyed. I bit my tongue. I could feel him nearby, we weren't going to give up now. I reached behind me for my pack and pulled out a black scarf and hooded sweater. Michonne watched me without helping.

"Dressing like a ninja is not going to help" she said, a smile lilting in her voice.

"Can't hurt" I answered, pulling the sweater over my head and wrapping the scarf around my face. I pulled up the hood and looked at them both. We'd parked on a side street, and I got out of the car, I looked up, noticing the light was fading fast. I smiled to myself. Things were starting to finally go our way.  
Glenn and Michonne also got out, looking at me like I was crazy, following me anyway. Like it should be.

"We'll find him" I said, pulling the scarf down. "We have to"


	8. Chapter 8

I lay on my bed and stared at the ceilin'. The light around the door was fadin', and I knew night was comin'. There were generators, but Ed didn't like the false light. More often'n not the guys went to bed with the sun, it made the most sense. They weren't completely stupid, after all.

I waited in the dark for the sound of movement. Some prick comin' to do the vile things they did before bed.  
No one came. I set myself up for rare respite. I was finally driftin' off when odd noises started outside, the door flew open. I sighed inside, but din't move. Not until I heard my name.

* * *

 

"I'll check this side, Glenn, you take the other, Michonne, you keep a lookout." I whispered in the darkness on the quiet street. I moved forward, pulling up the scarf around my face.  
I checked every car for any semblance of heat, mud, odd clean patches. I touched tyres and bonnets gently, freaking out that alarms could go off if I wasn't careful. I Tried to breathe slowly, evenly. My nimbleness wouldn't help me now. I had to be slow, thorough.

"Hey!" I heard from across the street, and I looked to see Glenn, his face open and excited. He must have found something. Staying low I headed toward him. "Look, windscreen's cleaner than the others, and the door handles are clean, too." I nodded,  
 circling the car in a crouching position, putting my hand up in the wheel arches. I found what I was hoping for. Fresh mud. I pulled my hand out and showed Glenn. He nodded, and stood, whistling quietly for Michonne. I stood and looked around us. The car was parked outside a police station. For a moment I wished for Rick. If anyone knew cop shops, it'd be him.

"Police stations have cells, right?" Michonne said, approaching us. I nodded "kinda makes sense, then" she followed. We looked at the building for what felt like an age, trying to work out how we might get in.

"There'll be a back way, a parking lot for the cars, a basement..." I rubbed my head "fuck!" We'd got so far, now we had to get in.

"Wait" Glenn said, pointing "fire escape. There must be a way in on the roof." I looked up. The fire escape was rusty, old, and probably dangerous.

"Is there a quieter way?" I wondered aloud.

"What about climbing up a building down the street?" Glenn said, but I shook my head.

"I'm not jumping over alley ways. I'm not a super hero, this isn't a film." He chuckled quietly

"If it was we could call Spider-Man" I scowled at him. He shrugged

"Just trying to lighten the mood"

"You hear that?" Michonne said suddenly, and we listened intently.

"Generators?" Glenn asked. Michonne nodded. If we could hear them, they'd be nearby. And the cables would have to reach in somehow, through an open door or window.

"You notice there's no walkers. Not even dead ones. It's creepy" Michonne put her hand on her katana and crouched low "the longer we stand here, the more I'm getting freaked out."

"Let's find the generators," I said, agreeing with her. "Then we'll find our way in." I walked up to the building, put my ear to the door.

"Jesus Abra" Glenn said "no wonder Daryl wanted you close by all the time" I looked at him, put a finger to my lips and shushed him. He shook his head and rolled his eyes all at once, but I continued to listen, ignoring him. I moved around the wall slowly. Inch by inch waiting for the noise to get louder.

"Down here" I said, when I'd reached a narrow alley "generators are this way."

I was right. And though I felt it in my very bones, it was still a relief. There, at the back of the building, four huge generators were strapped close together in a small ramshackle lean to, something clearly designed to keep the noise down. Pillows and blankets were stuffed all around each engine, within its heavy steel frame. I followed the cables with my eyes, too shattered to follow them with my hands. They looped up high, pinned to the building. I pointed, we'd come so far, why was I so tired now?  
Michonne and Glenn looked up, following the lines physically.

"Here" I heard and I got up. The cables went through a perfectly round hole in the glass of one of the Windows. Shit.

"Shit!" I said aloud, lifting up the scarf again to muffle the sound. I looked at my friends, I looked at the window, and then something in me just took over, adrenaline or rage. I wasn't about to give up having come so damned far. I walked up the window, looked through with my hands cupped at the dirty glass. It was pitch black inside and I nearly pulled out my torch. "I need a diversion" I said instead. "The cells will be back here, away from the law abiding public. If Daryl's here, he'll be in this end of the building. I need a diversion at the front so I can get in back here." Blank shocked eyes stared at me. "We can hold our own" I insisted. You dot even have to stay out there, just get some noise going" I shrugged. "Use there own tactic against them and set off some car alarms." Glenn went to speak, I stopped him. "This is Daryl, and we are yards away. Minutes." I rubbed my head, pinched the bridge of my nose. "He'd do it for anyone of you" Michonne shook her head.

"Not without knowing the risk. Abra we don't know how many people are in there." I shrugged.

"Fine. I'll do it" Glenn grabbed my arm and I had to stop myself from punching him.

"I'll do it" he said. "I'll make some noise. I'm quick enough to get around here before anyone gets out." He looked at Michonne apologetically "I promised Daryl I'd keep her safe. If she's gonna do it anyway, I should give her some cover" he dashed off around the building and Michonne looked at me.

"You better know what you're doing here" I shook my head

"I have no fuckin' idea"

I had every idea. When we heard the commotion out the front we would break the window here in the back and get in, find Daryl, and get out again. If we were seen we would have to kill. I didn't like that bit. The last people I had killed had Daryl but it was tough, and made me sick to my stomach. Hopefully now I could be stronger.

Michonne's head shot up as awful, irritating car alarms began to go off down the street. He set off at least 7. Some were winding down on dead batteries, but others were strong. When the commotion began from the inside and Glenn wasn't back I panicked, but Michonne just kicked forward and broke a window with her foot before dragging me forward and pushing me to get inside.

"You've started this now, don't freeze up on us" I scrabbled through the window, fitting with ease and let my eyes adjust before jumping off the frame. It was a locker room, and at the end I saw the only door which didn't lead to a shower cubical. I looked behind me, and Glenn was back, out of breath. They passed me my pack and climbed in behind me.

"Locker room" I whispered, "mind the bench seats, door there." I hopped over the benches one by one and stood by the exit. All thoughts of exhaustion gone, running on adrenaline alone. With the other two close by I opened the door a crack. All those generators and no lights, it was odd. I couldn't hear a thing inside, but I drew my knife anyway, and I heard the slick of Michonne's Katana, the swoosh of Glenn's Machete. I looked at them, nodded my head and pushed the door the rest of the way.


	9. Chapter 9

I released the breath I didn't know I had been holding. There was nothing out here, it seemed the whole group had gone to check out the alarms I could still hear going off in the street. Maybe they'd grown trusting, maybe they'd had it so good for so long they didn't think they needed a watch. 

I slowly moved forward in the unrelenting darkness, this appeared to be some kind of hallway with doors leading off on either side. I looked behind me and motioned to Glenn and Michonne, holding up both hands, fingers spread, then just two fingers. 12 doors. They seemed to understand, and Glenn moved forward. 8 of the doors were open, but 4 remained firmly shut against the night. He checked the first one, sliding the hatch in it slightly and looking in, as he did an almighty roar came from inside and someone, some _thing_ , threw itself at him, and long reaching, rotting fingers clawed for his living flesh. He jumped back, slammed the hatch shut, and the fingers fell to the floor. I looked at him, he nodded, he was ok.

Michonne stood by another door, and I lay my ear against a third.   
I watched as Michonne opened the hatch, expecting more of the same, but nothing happened. 

"Empty" she whispered. 

I realised the noise outside was quieting as whoever the group was in this place disconnected batteries. 

I pressed my ear harder against the door I stood by, wishing hard to hear something. Any sign at all that he was here, and at least alive. But I couldn't hear anything.   
In desperation I ignored the hatch and threw open the door, surprised by what I found. 

A room stacked ceiling high with makeshift shelving, each shelf packed with weapons, tools, and ammunition. I spied Daryl's cross bow and grabbed it, throwing it over my shoulder, crossing the strap with that of my pack, Michonne and Glenn reached my side and I heard Glenn let out a quiet impressed whistle. 

"Grab what you can. These guys were gearing up for something big, I'll get the last door." I moved away, not waiting to hear their complaints. 

I reached the door and let my fingers caress the handle, scared of what I might or might not find.   
After almost 7 months of knowing the exact words I would say to him, I felt suddenly shy and stupid.   
But I grasped the handle, to throw the door open and face this irrational fear.

As I began to put pressure on the door handle something ran into me from the left hand side, and knocked me on my ass two feet from the door. I looked up, getting to my knees, and there stood the largest monster of a man I had ever seen in my life. 

My breath caught in my throat as he eyed me hungrily, on my knees and vulnerable. I looked behind me quickly, noticing he was the only guy in there, and Glenn and Michonne had not been spotted.

I ran forward, into the guys chest, pulling my knife out on the way. He grabbed me and lifted me from my feet, as he did so I slit his throat. With surprise and speed on my side it was an easy kill. He squeezed me hard in his last moments. He gargled a stream of nonsense and bubbles before dropping me unceremoniously to the floor.

  
I fought for breath. Now more would undoubtedly be on the way. I threw the door in front of me open and spoke his name.

* * *

 

"Daryl?" I sat bolt up right at her voice.

"Abra?" She stood there, breathless, bloody, holding her side like she might have a stitch. 

"More, are coming," she said between breaths "we, gotta go" she pulled my crossbow over her head with great difficulty and held it out to me. "Come on, we'll have, to talk this shit out, on the way, home" I stood and walked over to her, hands bound in front of me.

She took her knife and grimaced, then grunted as she broke the ties. 

"Y'aight?" She nodded 

"Yeah, no. I don't know. Think that, fat bastard, broke my ribs." I looked past her outside the door and saw Davey there with his throat slit. "I should finish" she started, but I stopped her

"Let him turn. Let the fucker turn"

* * *

 

He looked like hell. I wasn't sure if I'd seen him earlier through rose tinted glasses, but right now he looked thin, wasting away, covered in bruises and dried blood. 

When he stopped me from ending the life of one of his captors for good, he spat the words, venomously and hideously. I'd never heard so much hatred in my life. 

I went to step over the body, leading Daryl to the rest of our small group.

"Glenn, Michonne. They're collecting, weaponry" I said at length, my side painful with each word. "We have, to get out" but I was grabbed around the waist and dragged backwards, into the room I had found Daryl in. The pain in my ribs was excruciating. I felt cold metal at my temple and found myself facing Daryl, who had launched himself into the doorway. 

"Don't move" I heard behind me. The voice I'd heard that morning. Daryl's face was hard, cold, even though his crossbow covered half of it, I could see he looked pissed. 

"Let her go" he said, barely moving from where he stood. "I'll stay, let her go" I felt the tip of the gun run down the side of my face, my neck, my breast. It stopped just before the swell was fullest.

"Reckon the heart's about here, don't you, Dare?" He pushed the gun into my body firmly and I grunted in pain.

"Ed you don't have to do this" the guy who had hold of me chuckled

"Yeah I do, you killed Davey! Eye for an eye, my man, you know how it works around here" 

I wondered absently if Michonne and Glenn were still around, if they'd heard my yell, if they'd run. If they were caught, too. 

Then the room filled with smoke.

* * *

 

I didn't see the smoke canister. But I heard it hit the floor and start to let off that fizz like they do. The air began to fill and I felt hands on me, pulling me away from Abra and Ed. I opened my mouth to yell but my lungs filled with smoke and nothin' but coughin' came out. 

We reached the outside, and I could hear walkers. I looked at Michonne and Glenn, my eyes waterin', sore from the smoke and I could barely see.

"Where's Abra?" Michonne said, and realisation dawned on Glenn's face. 

"Why'd you drag me outta there?" I said "They got Abra. That bastard rapist prick has got Abra!" I ripped my knife from its holster and turned, stabbing a walker in the temple as it crept up behind us. I could hear more comin' and I was stuck not knowin' what to do. 

They wouldn't kill her. She was worth far too much, but I knew what they could do. Too well I knew. 

Glenn grabbed my arm and dragged me forward.

"Run" he yelled and launched himself away as Walkers descended, brought on by the noise.

So I ran. I left Abra behind and I ran.

I tried to sit in the car without grimacing, I tried to just act like nothin' had happened, but I felt hollowed out.

"These guys" I said "they ain't gonna back down. They've been watchin' Alexandria for a while. N it ain't just them, there's more, scattered" Glenn looked back at me and nodded

"Hold your horses, Daryl, we'll get Rick and everyone together and talk it out back home." He was right. No use tellin' the story twice.

I thought of Abra, ribs cracked or broken, a lump on her forehead the size of a grapefruit and blood pourin' from her temple to her chin. She'd never looked more beautiful to my eyes'n she did standing in the doorway of that cell.


	10. Chapter 10

The smoke cleared after a while. Ed still had hold of me and was coughing and hacking into my ear.  
Daryl was gone. 

"Fuck!" Ed yelled, sending my head spinning. He threw me to one side and I crashed to the floor, hitting my head again, my ribs bursting with pain. I watched him leave the room, and run straight through where Davey should have been lying. 

Davey wasn't there. 

I tried to get up, but the pain was insane, and I couldn't move.  
I wondered if Daryl, Michonne and Glenn had left, or if they were still around.  
Ed came back, face utterly furious. 

"Lover boy's left ya, princess. Just driven off into the night with ya friends. Ya thievin', ammunition stealin', bastard friends!" He slammed the door behind him and the room plunged into darkness.  
It worried me at first, but in the end, I was glad I couldn't see.

* * *

 

I told Rick, The whole group, about what happened. About losing my memory, about what I'd learned about these animals who took me, the guys who were a group of about 50, scattered around the area in smaller groups. I apologised to everyone for storming off.  
Told 'em the group were comin' soon, and that taking me away and the lives of one of their own might gear them on to come sooner. N now they had Abra, they would feel they had the upper hand, certainly over me. Rick weren't surprised.

"What ever you have, someone else is gonna want it" he said "you guys get some rest, it's good to have you back Daryl" he went to pat my shoulder and I stiffened, so he didn't. "We're with you" Rick said pointedly, "And we'll get Abra back in one piece." then he turned to the rest of 'em "we get together in the morning, go over the stock in the armoury, including all the stuff you guys brought back. They're gonna move fast now, and we're gonna be ready."

People started peeling away to their own houses and own rooms. Carol sat on the couch, Charlie lying next to her, kicking his legs.  
I just stood in the corner feelin' like I didn't belong there, awkward.

"You stuck with Charlie?" I chewed  
My thumb a little

"Yeah" Carol said "Abra did. He's your double he has your eyes, and your hair" She smiled down at the little boy, "I swear when he smiles, only one corner of his mouth lifts, just like you" She looked up, 

"Yeah?" I asked, walking over. 

"Yeah." I crouched by the three seater and held out a finger for Charlie to hold. 

"What happened out there, Daryl?" I shook my head. 

"I can't." I said. She nodded, left it there. 

"We'll get Abra back" I shrugged 

"They'll bring her here, danglin' like a carrot. They're gonna break her before that though, Carol. I know what they can do" she reached for me, but I shrugged away from her touch. 

"Won't get that far, Daryl, they'll  
Move fast, they won't have time to break her."

* * *

 

I lay in the dark, waiting. I had no idea how long I'd been there, could have been hours, days or weeks. I realised Daryl probably had no clue how long he'd been locked up, either. 

I listened for the footsteps that meant they were back. The footsteps that made me shake violently and involuntarily.  
I wondered if they did the things to Daryl that they did to me. 

I heard the footsteps, and the shakes started. The door opened. What tool today, I wondered. Anaesthesia would have been welcome this time, but I saw the glint of the gun. I closed my eyes as I heard the click of the safety catch. I thought maybe being shot would be better. I thought maybe dead would be welcome.

But the gun wasn't put to my head, nor in my mouth. The cold hard steel was pushed up between my legs. 

I didn't squirm or fight, I didn't want the gun to go off inside me.  
Instead I lay and waited for it to be over.

* * *

 

In the Mornin' at the kitchen table with a map between us we discussed our options. 

If the group came to us it would destroy what everyone had worked so hard for, if we went to them we risked losing Abra, and Alexandria being taken in our absence.

I showed Rick all the places I knew the group were staying, none of em too far away, and where they got together for their rumour updates.  
Maggie suggested we take the young'uns somewhere safe, and I noticed for the first time how her stomach was swellin', how she kept rubbin' her hand over it protectively. 

"You too" I said, and she shook her head 

"I can still fight. We can send one of the women with the kids, keep 'em safe" but Rick shook his head

"Nowhere's safe anymore" he looked at me. "we stay here, and we hold our ground. We protect our territory. We'll get the kids to safety far away from the gates. This won't be the Prison all over again. We're stronger than that now." 

"Yeah, but we're fewer. These guys have been watchin' the place. But I have an idea" He looked at me questioning, and I explained exactly what I thought would work best, against these hideous men I knew better'n he did.

* * *

 

"They've left ya Sweetheart" he said in the darkness, voice close to my ear. "Up, n gone." I heard his jeans hit the floor by his feet and swallowed down acid which had risen in my throat "so Alexandria is free for the takin" I wanted to tell him no, it wouldn't be. There'd be a plan, they wouldn't just go. But I didn't. 

He ran a hand up my back and neck and into my hair, then pushed me heavily, bending me until my head hit the bed in front of us. He leant over me, resting his weight along my back.

"In the mornin we're all gonna take a little trip and see what they've left us" he fisted my hair and pulled it hard, I called out through gritted teeth and he laughed.

He pulled my head up off the bed and kicked my legs apart roughly. He leant over me again and whispered  
"We know one thing they left us. Best fuck we've had this side of the end of the world"


	11. Chapter 11

They stuffed me in to the back of a car and drove to Alexandria. When we pulled up the other groups were already there.  Ed grasped me and pulled me out of the vehicle, and I stumbled with my feet bound.

The first thing I saw was the open gate. A heinous crime in these times of walkers, and doubt flooded me. Maybe they had left.

"Told ya sweetheart" Ed said, a big grin on his face, "up n left, just like that" I shook his gripping hand off my arm and hobbled forward. I looked up at the empty tower, the bare platform. As I peered through the open gate, tears stinging in my eyes, I heard a gun fire. Shocked I turned, to see a walker at my feet.  Ed still held up his gun at arms length.  "Careful princess," I gawked at the walker, so close to just walking in. This was ridiculous. "Aren't ya gonna thank me?" Ed asked "I saved ya life" I didn't say anything, just turned back to the ghost town I once lived in, heart sinking rapidly.

I felt an arm slide around my shoulders and turned my head to see Steve

"It's a shame, was kinda lookin' forward to a good fight" he said, jovially. He turned back to Ed and the crew, and as I watched, his face exploded.

* * *

We din't leave.

  
We started our own rumour, sent Glenn n some others on a run, right past where one of the hideouts were, talkin' loudly about leaving. Rumours have a funny way of spreadin'.

We got the Alexandrian's who wanted to go as far away as we could, Eric n Aaron convincin' them that they'd be safe. Eric n Aaron the two recruiters they trusted the most, who knew the area like no one else.

Some Alexandrian's _did_  want to help. Abra was a well loved member of the community, n they didn't want to lose what they had fought so hard for. Lost so much for. They were scared, n they were naive, but they took direction well, and the tension of their fear set us all into a buzz.

  
When the slimy asshole Steve, who 'liked 'em cold' snaked his hand around her, I couldn't hold back, I just fired the rifle right into his god forsaken face.  


* * *

Covered in blood, bone, and brains I watched, shocked, as Steve flew back onto the ground. Ed ran forward and grabbed me, holding me in front of him like a shield. He got Tommy's attention.

"You said they left!" He roared "what the fuck Tommy?" I noticed that others in the group, many of them men I didn't know, had pulled out weapons and were looking for the sniper. I looked around too, harnessing the lessons I had learned in my time with Rick and the group.

They were up high, probably dead ahead of where Steve and I had stood. I looked for a glint of sun off metal in the empty and derelict buildings surrounding the community, but they were well hidden. I knew as much as Ed did.

"They left, we watched 'em go in a bunch a cars and on a 'bike!" Tommy said in a rush. "We saw em go!" He was gesturing wildly in his panic. Ed swung around, holding me in front of him. I slipped over my own bound feet and he dragged me up again roughly. He squeezed the top of my arm and hissed in my ear.

"Where are they?" I shook my head. How could I know? "Right!" He yelled, pointing over my shoulder at his men. "You, you, you, go and find the bastards, they can't be far. No one's that good a shot" I snorted and he shook me "got somethin' to say bitch?"

"What happened to Princess?" I asked. "You won't get out of this alive" he laughed at that, giggled like a maniac.

"Oh, if you're lucky, neither will you"

He ran his gun down the side of my face, and looked up and around him, he began to yell  
"You watchin', Daryl? You wanna see what I'm willin' to do?" He span me to face him and ripped my sweatshirt open.

* * *

 

She was covered in bruises. Now I could see the red marks fingers had made on her neck. The large red welts on her chest. The bruises broken ribs n fists had left. I heard Sacha exhale beside me, getting ready to shoot.  
I stopped her.

"No"

"I have a clear line" she argued, face confused.

"Nah. He don't get off so easy" I said. He was hidin behind her again now, anyway. Like a coward.

"This is nothin' Daryl" Ed was sayin' "you n I both know it. Oh the things I've made her do" he looked at Abra, leaned in close and licked her face. Blood brains n all, then looked out again. "She's just purty as a picture, ain't she? You should hear the noises I've made come outta her. You should hear the screams"

As if he'd made some cue, screaming started behind us. His minions sent to find us had stumbled into one of our traps.  
Guns started goin off, haphazard. I struggled not to turn n look. I wanted to keep my eyes on Ed n Abs.  
"All I want is Alexandria" Ed said, ignorin' the ruckus. "You get ya girl back and I get the town. You've now destroyed several of my people, this isn't a fair trade on your part" he was starting to look crazy, hair stickin up all over, face turning red.

"It's time." Rick said behind me. I grabbed the radio beside me and spoke into it quietly.

* * *

It felt anticlimactic, after Steve's face got blown off I was expecting more. As Ed licked my face and offered me as a swap I wondered if Steve hadn't been accidentally shot by one of their own.  
I heard the gate shut behind us and Ed turned us both. There was no one there and he pushed me forward to investigate. As we approached missiles came over the wall, landing on the parked cars.

"Grenade!" Someone yelled, and Ed pushed me into the gate leaping off himself to take cover. I waited for the explosion, the heat, the shrapnel, but they didn't come. It wasn't a bomb but a handful of smoke grenades. As smoke filled the air gun shots started, close by and repetitive. There was yelling and screaming and it all seemed to be coming from Ed's people. I didn't hear a single voice I could recognise.

"Cold ones!" I heard someone shout "they sent in fuckin' cold ones" and panic rose in me, I was unarmed and tied up. It was then that a hand grabbed my arm from behind, pulled me into the gate, and slit my bindings with a knife. The gate shut once again with a crash.

The smoke hadn't reached its fingers this far, and I could see the people who had thrown the gas bombs. Standing along the wall on a new platform which was only about half way up were Maggie, Jesse, Spencer and Tara.

"You didn't leave" was all I could manage before my body and my brain caught up and I realised I was home. I started to shake and had to sit down. I did so, right there by the gate.

"C'mon" I heard Maggie say "we've got work to do" and I watched as she and Tara disappeared.

* * *

  
 As the smoke started and the walkers approached it was all too easy. We din't  bring the walkers in, not on purpose, the noise had. From above I could still see, Sacha could too, n we picked off what we could right then. I got up n went down to the ground, crossbow on my back, rifle held across my chest. This would be over quicker than we anticipated, but I had plans for Ed. I opened the door of the derelict house a fraction and looked out.

"What you doing Daryl?" Rick said right by my ear. I think he was aiming to surprise me, I think in six months he forgot what I do.

"Gotta retrieve a couple things from this mess" I said quietly "somethin' of Abra's." I shrugged "somethin' just for me"

"There's got to be 20 walkers out there, and scared men with automatic weapons" I chewed my lip

"Yeah, I know" He din't say anythin else. I he din't need to, I knew what he was thinkin "I gotta do this" I said, walking out into the chaos.


	12. Chapter 12

The chemical tinged smell of the smoke hit my nostrils and I worked not to cough up a load a noise. I needed to be hidden, and the smoke screen would only work so well.

As my eyes and ears adjusted, though, I realised all around me was a caterwaulin', screamin' mass of nonsense. Men bein' eaten alive, or shot by accident by their own. I hoped I was obvious to my own people. I hoped I wouldn't be goin' down in a blaze of rifle fire.

I edged carefully around the buildin' I came out of, headin' first for Ed's own car. Observation weren't helpin' me now in the midst of the smoke, but if my memory served me right it was the closest to the gate.

I reached the fences of home and continued to move with my back against the solid mass of corrugated steel. A hand reached up and grabbed my leg. I stamped on it, not knowin' if it was walker or human. Not that it mattered. Everyone in this shit storm was an enemy. I moved on, not lookin back where I'd come from, my eyes only for Ed's car n the item I needed first.

* * *

 

Smoke began to stretch its lazy fingers around the open metalwork of the gate.  
In stunned silence I watched as it curled ever closer, dissipating as it did so to a mild fog. More smoke bombs were launched over the fence and I just sat and watched the horror outside the walls unfold.

The noise was deafening. A cacophony of screaming, shouting, growling and gunfire.

Other than those inside, I hadn't seen any of our people. Were they up there, somewhere, raining bullets on the dead and undead alike? Or were they watching with glee as walkers stole the lives of the monsters who had captured me and Daryl?

No one deserves to die like that.  
The thought shook me. How could I have sympathy for these men? But Ben flashed in my mind, and what he went through, the torment in his face and his mind that almost destroyed me.

Those animals needed to die, but the quicker they were gone the better. Less walkers, less fear, less chance of death for the innocent.

Innocent.

We weren't the innocent ones.  
I shook my head as though it might clear the stupid thoughts I was having. I was in shock, that was all. Of course these men deserved to suffer, more than anything they should!

I looked at the gate, considering getting up, covering my cold body with something.  
I stopped in my tracks

The gate was open, and Ed was there, Grinning like a maniac,eyes wide and staring, blood dripping from his mouth and soaking his shirt.

He held a rifle which he didn't have ten minutes ago. His hand gun was nowhere in sight, with the mist curling around his body it was like a waking nightmare.

* * *

I put my hand on the handle of the car door and pulled very gently, it opened with a quiet click, but there was so much noise elsewhere it made no difference.

I reached in felt around, findin' what I wanted quicker than I thought I would. I threw it over my shoulder and edged again to the walls of Alexandria. 

Then I heard her. Very clearly, considerin'.

"How?" It was one word, but it was enough. It was Full of dread, terror. I walked forward without thinkin'. Forgettin' the carnage n danger, I just moved towards her voice.  
More hands reached for me, but I skirted em with ease.

The smoke had begun to clear, but more canisters came over the wall, the smoke screen kept up to aid our side.

My eyes were sore, my lungs were heavy with the gas, but I moved forward regardless, needing to find what had scared her.

As I reached the gate I noticed it was open, though I was sure I saw her dragged in an the gate closed again behind her. But that wasn't the most pressing point.

Before me was the broad back of that little prick Ed. Abra was staring at him, mouth open in a grimace of exhaustion and pain. Breathing through her mouth in short bursts.

I watched as his shoulders moved and he brought his rifle up to his eye. I swung my own armoury to my face,

"Don't fucking move asshole"

* * *

 

I stared, awestruck, at Ed in his insanity. I had to fight not to look up at Jesse and Spencer, not to show this crazy monster there were people at the wall.

I was waiting for one of them to shoot him. Out the corner of my eye I could just see them staring, scared.

"How?" I asked, meaning to go on, 'how did you get in' but the rest of the words didn't come.

Ed swung around and shot both Jesse and Spencer square between the eyes.

I couldn't move, I couldn't scream, I just stood and gawked at him. He turned back to me, the crazy smile never leaving his face.

I didn't see Daryl through the smoke, but I heard him loud and clear.

"Don't fucking move asshole"  
The world seemed to stop. The noise died down to a low buzz and in slow motion Ed's smile grew impossibly wider, taking over his face with blood stained teeth.

He cocked his head to one side and seemed to listen intently. His eyes never left mine.

"All ya men are dead or dyin'. Ya got nothin' left" Ed's eyebrows shot up, and he stretched his neck, still not looking away from me.

"Then I got nothin' to lose" He swung around, rifle up, to face Daryl.

* * *

 

I knew it was gonna happen I think before he decided n I threw myself to one side, pulling Abra's holster from my shoulder and flinging it towards her.

As I landed I brought out the rifle and shot aimlessly, getting Ed in the leg. He fell to his knees and his own rifle went off, the bullet hitting the ground next to me, spattering me in hot broken asphalt.

Ed was yelling, his mouth full of blood. I got up and rushed forward, skirting the screaming man. Abra hadn't caught her belt, and was retrieving it from the floor. I grabbed the other end of it with her, and for a second our eyes met. Then her eyes shifted behind me, and widened in panic.

* * *

I looked up as I noticed him grab the belt at the same moment I did, and our eyes met. My heart stopped for just a second, but then I saw movement through the last of the smoke.

Walkers. I took a deep and painful breath before telling him

"Run"


	13. Chapter 13

I couldn't run. With busted ribs and shaking legs I could barely stumble after Daryl's back. I called him, a harsh whisper through the pain of simply breathing

"Daryl" and he stopped, coming back to drag me forward by the arm. His fingers squeezed hard enough to leave bruises. It wasn't the reunion I'd been hoping for, but it certainly brought back memories.

We stumble-ran to the nearest house, slamming the door behind us and leaning against it, catching what breath we could.

"Where is everyone?" I slid an arm under my chest as though to hold myself together.

"Outside" He said simply, peering through the window at the door.

"I don't know if I can run anymore" I wasn't talking about my ribs, I wasn't talking about today. He made a noncommittal sound of agreement, still watching the herd through the glass. He turned and looked me up and down before pulling off his vest and jacket, giving me the denim coat and putting the leather vest back around his shoulders.

"Thanks" I said, replacing my ripped hoodie with his jacket, fumbling with the buttons.

"Put ya belt on." he hissed, though I was just about to do so, given the chance. I didn't reply, though, just wrapped the pink leather around my hips.

I stood behind him at the window and felt the thrum of energy coursing through his arm. I looked up at his face, set and stern as he looked out into the street, but couldn't read him. He gripped the curtain in his hand and all but ripped it from the rail.

"Stop starin'" He demanded, then "We need to do somethin' 'bout those walkers" he turned away and headed for the stairs in the carbon copy house we had ended up in.

* * *

 

She was glarin' at me in that way she had n it was sendin' me on edge. I couldn't tell her what was goin' on in my head, n she was tryin'a figure it out by my face. I knew how she worked. I told her to stop, I couldn't have her delvin' into what my mind was seein', not for a while. Not 'til Ed was dead and my own memories of the last 6 months din't make me wanna burn my own eyeballs out.

I dread to think what they did to her.

That sent more anger through me, so I decided to take my mind off it.

"We need to do somthin' 'bout those walkers" I said, takin' the stairs two at a time. I heard a whimper behind me, n turned to see her strugglin' to move again. I headed straight for the bathroom, knowin' where it was cause all the houses were the same.

She reached the top of the stairs some 20 seconds later, as I searched the bathroom cabinet for somethin' to ease her pain. She watched, breathin' shallow as I pulled out half a bottle of Vicodin. She dry swallowed two without so much as a flinch.

"You gotta breathe deeper" I said. "You'll get pneumonia 'f'ya don't. Don't need that, not now." She looked at me and took a deep breath, face contortin' with pain. It would do. the Vicodin would get to work eventually. I headed into the front bedroom, setting myself up with a desk chair at the window. The hoard needed cuttin' down to size.

* * *

I stood, helpless, at the door as Daryl picked the walkers off one by one. I wondered how many there were, how many more were coming. If the fight outside was over or still going on. I ventured into the room, not knowing if whoever lived here was alive or dead. I opened the wardrobe hoping to find a gun or some ammo, but there was nothing of any use.

"Shit" Daryl said at the window, and I went to him.

"What?" I looked out, the walkers were a much thinner crowd now than when they started.

"Ed. He's gone" He stood up, turning away from the window. "Lock the door, stay inside" I frowned at him

"Er. You're not going out there" he nodded

"I have to" I took a step back from him, looking at him closely

"No. You don't" He turned to leave, but stopped in the doorway at my words "You're going to risk your life, saving him from walkers, so you can satisfy a vendetta?" He looked down at the floor, then turned his head part way back towards me, answering softly

"I'm comin' back Abs"

* * *

"What if you don't?" she answered, and I could tell by her voice she was nearly cryin'. How could I explain to her a part a me was already dead? I couldn't, so I left, shutting the door behind me "You could _DIE_ " She yelled, pummelling the door, but all I kept thinkin' was that he could _live_.

I checked out the front window, seeing walkers at the gate chowin' down on Jesse and Deanna's kid. there were no more comin' but the gate needed closin'. I opened the front door and stepped out, lookin' around. the smoke was all but gone, the noise now nothin' but walker growls. I swapped the rifle for my crossbow, feelin' more at ease with the 'bow ready, and moved forward into the mostly deserted streets.

"Daryl?" I heard from beyond the wall, and Rick came in the gate. "It's over" he said. "Got a lot of work to do, lot of burning." He looked down at the geeks eatin' his girlfriend and the Spencer boy, pullin' out the Colt on his hip and shootin' each one in the head. He didn't give the victims a second glance.

"Ed's here" I said to him, and his face turned even colder.

"Walkers?" He asked, and I shrugged.

"One or two left." I looked around us, he was right, a lot of walkers to burn, a couple bodies to bury, and Ed around somewhere. He was top a my list.

"Abra?" He asked, and I nodded

"Couple'a broken ribs and a shit load'a bruises. She'll be alright" He looked at me intently.

"Go." He said, "Make it quick." Quick was the last thing I was gonna make it, but I agreed with him anyway, before following the blood spatters that would lead me to the bastard.

* * *

I watched the exchange through the bedroom window, watching Daryl's path and where it could lead. I chewed the inside of my cheek, popped another Vicodin, and headed for the stairs. Outside was deathly quiet. I headed out the back of the house so as not to draw attention to myself. It was eerie and still, and by the angle of the shadows, a lot later than I thought. I headed the same way I saw Daryl go, hoping to catch up to Ed, or Daryl, before thwey found each other.

My ribs were still sore, but the Vicodin felt like it was starting to work, and I moved quickly.

* * *

I found him in a garage half way down the street. He was bloody and sick, but it weren't enough.

He looked up as I walked in, and smiled, still full of blood, still horrendous in his insanity.

"Bonnie _AND_ Clyde" he said breathlessly. I narrowed my eyes and turned to see Abra standing in the doorway.

"I told you to stay put" she shrugged

"I told _you_ you didn't have to do this" I was concerned that even breathin' heavy and stumblin' she managed to crept up on me. My head weren't in the right place.

"You have to get over this, Daryl." She was sayin' "Just kill the sick fucker and we can talk everything out" I shook my head, turnin' back to Ed, aiming my 'bow at him so he wouldn't try n escape.

"Nah, He needs to suffer for what he's done." Ed was laughin' away to himself. She walked up to me, I heard her as clear as a bell this time, and put her hand on my arm. She was so calm, so still.

"He's been bitten, he's been shot" She took her hand away. "He didn't do that to me, and you don't look shot or bitten. So what are you going to do? Rough him up? Sodomise him? Eye for an eye, right?" She stood between me n Ed, facing me. "You're no better than he is if you don't just shoot him outright."

"Ain't about who's better'n who. It's about right n wrong. It's about takin' me away from you'n Charlie for six months. It's about havin' to leave you behind." She looked at me, eyes all big and sad.

"It's not your fault"

"I should never've left" she nodded and shrugged at the same time.

"Maybe. But it's not your fault." I eyed her, considerin' pushin' her outta the way so I could do this, but I couldn't move. "You need to let it go" she said again, and moved to the side. I looked between her and Ed, not knowin' what to do. Ed was all but dead anyway. I let fly, arrow landin' in and explodin' his left eye

 

 


	14. EPILOGUE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not the end.
> 
> It's just the end of this part of the series x

We burned the walkers, and those in Ed's crew who died before they could turn. Ed himself was top of the pile.

I watched the flames snake and dance in the dark of that late summer evening, hugging myself. The Vicodin was working wonders, and Dr. Denise had patched me up with bandages so I felt like I didn't have to hold my ribs together anymore.

We buried Jesse and Spencer. the last of his family to go, Spencer was buried close to his parents and brother, Jesse couldn't be buried with Pete, Pete was not within the walls.

Sam and Ron were parentless, orphaned in this cruel world, not by walkers and monsters but by men.

Ron was pissed.

He kept eyeing Carl and Rick like they had done this, but I thought, really, it was Daryl and I. We brought these men here, we started this small battle. He tried to convince us all that he could take care of Sam, but instead we found them a new home, and adoptive carers, people they knew, people they trusted. It was a small victory, but it was one, none the less.

 

Daryl and I, we were broken, and I feared it would be forever. Our own mental scars and emotional worries were too much to cope with alone, but we didn't fight hard enough to share them together.

We didn't 'split up' we slept in the same bed together every night that we were together, we looked after Charlie like he was our own child together, we went on runs and Daryl never let me leave his sight.

But it was different.

The space between us growing larger with every passing day that we didn't speak about what had happened.

 


End file.
